Sweet Talk
by smilelikey0umeanit
Summary: A short, non-shippy one-shot featuring merciless teasing of Brian, sticky toffee pudding and a discussion about Gerry's favourite topic- love...


**_Disclaimer: I don't own New Tricks._**

Sweet Talk

"Esther, this is lovely." Sandra's compliment broke the companionable silence that had descended around the table since Esther had served dinner. It was their monthly team gathering, and the five of them were seated around the large dining table in the warm house, the noise of the April showers beating on the windows only faintly distinguishable against the soft clatter of cutlery on ceramic and the gentle music still playing from the radio in the kitchen.

"I'll second that. Have you used goose fat on the roasties?" Gerry inquired of the only person who he could conduct a decent culinary discussion with, or at least one that didn't involve exotic food so spicy that it practically melted your insides.

"Of course," the woman in question responded with a smile. "I'm glad you like it, I must admit I wasn't sure how this was going to turn out what with Brian distracting me, I nearly forgot all about the meat in the oven."

Brian looked down guiltily to avoid his wife's icy stare, which wasn't made any more comfortable by the sniggering of his three colleagues. "It's not my fault the computer broke," he tried in vain to defend himself, his child-like pouting only having the opposite effect of exacerbating the chuckles into full-scale laughter.

"It's alright Brian, we all panic when our computers break…" Gerry said, putting his hand reassuringly on his friend's shoulder whilst smirking at Jack.

"Yeah, of course we do…" he returned the expression, placing his silverware on the plate. "Only we don't damage them even more by chucking orange juice all over them, you silly sod!"

He and Gerry broke into a fresh round of laughter, leaning back in their chairs and clutching their stomachs as tears of mirth filled their eyes. The two women in the room simply exchanged an eye-roll, shaking their heads at the antics of their boys.

"Alright, alright, it's not that funny." Sandra attempted to regain control over the pair, their fits of hilarity prolonged by Brian's petulant pout returning and firmly crossed arms. "It could have happened to anyone, it's not like he meant to spill it…" All went quiet as she paused for dramatic effect. "Oh wait…he did!"

The table erupted in laughter once again, enriched with the throaty laugh of Sandra, and Esther's softer tones.

"Ah, that was a good 'un, Guv," Gerry chuckled, wiping away his tears with a napkin as the atmosphere returned to relative calm.

"I live to please Gerald," she returned, a smirk playing at the edges of her lips.

"I bet you do,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" she questioned, a perfect eyebrow raised.

"Nothing Guv'nor…" he replied cryptically, instantly met with a suspicious stare from her narrowed blue eyes, their colour made ever more potent by the contrast of her charcoal eyeliner.

"Right," Esther took the opportunity to break the tension between them. "Who's for dessert?"

All four responded with a resounding yes, smiling as Esther left the room, her refusal of their frequent offers to assist reminding them that she really was the epitome of the perfect hostess.

"How much will it cost to get your laptop fixed then, Brian?" Sandra asked, genuinely feeling sorry for him despite the humour of the situation; he'd been attached to the computer for a few years now, and she'd rarely seen him enter the office without it.

"Let's just say it'll be cheaper to get a new one." He replied briefly, his mind constantly replaying the crushing moment when he had carelessly knocked over the glass of orange liquid on to his beloved laptop, in his moment of rage about the error message that appeared on the screen every ten minutes without fail.

"Oh well, maybe you could get a better one?" she suggested.

"Yeah, as soon as you buy somethin' a better one comes on to the market these days," Gerry agreed.

"Hmm…" the older man mused. "Listen, you know mine and Esther's anniversary is coming up-"

"You didn't mention it, how many years have you been married?" Jack interjected.

"Forty years. We met on the second of April, 1974, at four twenty in the afternoon."

"Bloody hell, Brian, I'm impressed. Couldn't even remember any of my wives' birthdays, never mind when we met." Gerry chuckled.

"Anyway, I was wondering what to get her." He said quietly, his voice lowered secretively so his wife couldn't hear the discussion. "I want her to have a special day, you know, after all that I've put her through."

"Aww, Brian, that's lovely of you." Sandra smiled. "What were you thinking?"

"Well, that's my problem. I don't know, so I was going to ask you for ideas."

"Because Gerry and I are so good at holding down relationships," she joked, smiling at the Cockney.

"Speak for yourself," he returned with a grin. "You want something special. You've been together forty years, you want to show how much you love her, you need to pull out all the stops mate."

"No, no, no." Jack held up his hands, motioning for the other man to stop. "You need to keep it simple. As long as you've put effort into it, she'll love it. There's no need to spend a lot of cash. Money doesn't buy love."

Gerry shrugged. "Fair enough, you're the expert mate. I'm just saying, it needs to be something pretty special…"

"Hold on a minute. I know I'm no expert when it comes to love but I am a woman." The blonde rationalised. "Has anyone actually considered what Esther might want here? You need to appeal to what she likes, what she enjoys doing. Now I know her fairly well, and I would say that she isn't one for huge parties or expensive displays of affection, but I agree this needs to be special."

She paused as the men nodded in agreement. "So let's start from the basics. How often do you tell her you love her?"

Brian frowned. "Well, I don't know, maybe…once, twice a…month? No…? Week?"

His three colleagues collectively shook their heads in disapproval. "Well there's a start, at least." Jack muttered.

"You've got to tell her more, Brian, come on. God knows how you've stayed married for this long."

"I'm not saying you should tell her all the time though, it does get a bit irritating after a while to be honest. Maybe once a day?" Sandra suggested.

"Right, let me make a mental note," Brian mumbled, met with smiles from his team.

"Okay, so that's one thing. What else does she like?"

"Erm…reading? She reads every night before she goes to sleep. And cooking, she does quite a lot of that."

"The latter is probably out of necessity to keep you fed, you'd forget to bloody eat if it was down to you." Jack remarked, the kindness in his eyes removing the sting from the comment.

"Nah, trust me, she likes cooking. She wouldn't go to all this trouble if she didn't."

"That's true, but perhaps we should target something different than the everyday things that she does. What about those classes that she goes to, which ones has she been to recently?"

"Bloody hell Sandra, calm down, it's not a drugs raid, it's only their anniversary for Christ's sake," Gerry retorted, noticing that she had lapsed into the authoritative tone of voice that marked her as a natural leader, one which they often heard at work.

"Well sorry Gerald, unlike you I just want Brian and Esther to have a nice-"

"Dessert's here, I hope you all like it. Sticky toffee pudding and custard, or I've got some cream if you prefer. What were you saying, Sandra?" Esther asked, carefully placing the immaculately presented dessert in the centre of the table before returning to her seat, the sweet smell of the toffee filling the room.

"Oh, nothing really. We were just talking about relationships, that's all. That looks delicious, Esther, thank you." The younger woman quickly altered the course of the conversation, much to the relief of the three men.

"You're very welcome, tuck in." she smiled. "Relationships, eh. It's our anniversary soon, isn't it Brian?"

"It certainly is."

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_**A/N: I've experimented with a slight change in style with this one so any feedback is greatly appreciated :)**_


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